Thursday, July 27, 2006

A postcard from Amsterdam

"Courage, spirit of enterprise and passion for quality, these were the characteristics that moved Gerard Adriaan Heineken. At nearly 22 years of age, he decided to invest the money he had just inherited from his father in beer. Beer... he did not know anything about brewing himself."

It doesn't take long to realize that "The Heineken Experience" takes itself a little too seriously. In case you don't figure it out from the history lesson at the beginning of the tour, the life of a Heineken bottle simulator -- in which you watch a screen while the floor tilts gently in various directions -- pretty much clinches it. But 10 Euro for three beers and a bottle opener isn't such a bad deal, so former Lucky's Chinese deliveryman Tony Chan and I decided to pay a visit.

The Doha trade talks collapsed right before I arrived, as the farm lobbies of Western Europe and the United States once again have managed to convince their governments to go back on their word not to screw poor countries, at least not so obviously. Being in Amsterdam, we opted not to discuss this depressing turn of events and instead explore the local customs.

Luckily, this was the last time the camera worked before I left Amsterdam, so nothing too incriminating could be caught on film.

5 comments:

blondebomber said...

That picture looks so gay. Hope you are having fun.

Nemesis of Evil said...

You should have seen the sing-along-video that we produced earlier. We were standing in front of a video screen of a small band of strange-looking Dutch caricatures and not entirely sure what exactly we were saying, other than that it had the word "Amsterdam" in it.

Sigua said...

Wiener, you've come so far from the "my body is a temple" days. I'm so proud.

bigdra said...

Ha! Hell yeah he has. Now all I have to do is go to Holland with Jon Wubbels and Jon Chang and then I will have enjoyed the Low Countries with all of the Jonathans from Bullis.

Kathy Schrenk said...

Your description of the Heinikin brewery tour sounds a lot like the tour of the Miller brewery in Milwaukee. (Except you don't get a sassy tour guide asking the crowd "What time is it?!?" You know the answer) I think I'd rather be in Amsterdam. But hey, you get all the Miller you can drink after the tour.